Living with Ed, I often felt like I was mute.  I had no voice because it had been taken by Ed.  My words were simply his and I really felt like the real me as invisible.

The gift of recovery is that I no longer feel the need to keep quiet, in fact the complete opposite!!  I am ready to tell the world about my story and passion for recovery because I know that in doing so, it can help others find their own freedom.

Today I had the pleasure of meeting with a young lady who has experienced her own battle with Ed.  It was truly refreshing to see the energy and sparkle in her face as she told me of her drive to raise awareness.  I know that with folks like this out there, we can raise awareness and take some of the stigma away from eating disorders.

And so as we look ahead to the launch of NEDAwareness 2012, my encouragement to you is to speak out!!  As NEDA says, "Everybody knows Somebody"!!  Let's show Ed that he is a force to be reckoned with, and in fact that his days are truly numbered!!!

Here's to OUR voice!!  Here's to discovering the recovery voice that is within you, and here's to no longer hiding!!!

Happy Valentine's Day to you!!
No matter where you look, you can't help but be bombarded with messages of Valentine's Day! When living with Ed, I didn't think that I would have find a true Valentine - mainly because I didn't think I was worthy of loving, believing Ed's lies that I was worthless.
The gift of recovery is that I have learned to love ME!!! It didn't matter how much unconditional love I got from my puppies, from my family, or friends, true recovery began when I accepted who I was and learned to love ALL of me!!
The path to self-love was slow, but it began by loving things for their function - for example, my legs because they allow me to walk on the beach, my fingers because they can dial a phone number or type a message, or my eyes because of the beautiful sunsets they can enjoy. From there, I realized that who I am is pretty amazing and that I was worthy of love.
So today I challenge you to look at yourself through the eyes of a loved one! Recognize that you deserve that bouquet of flowers that you bought yourself, or the pedi you treated yourself too!! And most of all, look in the mirror and recognize the beauty that is within you - because it IS there!!
Go on, I DARE you!!

Today I was driving down to a meeting when, all of a sudden, I panicked.  You see, I was on a road I'd not been on for a while and for a moment, did not recognize it at all!!  I completely panicked, didn't know what to to do - should I turn round,  keep going, trust that it was right?  Fortunately, within a couple of minutes, I began to see familiar sights and realized that I was in the right place after all!!
Don't you think that's how recovery can be sometimes?  We continue moving forward, but then all of a sudden we panic and feel like we're in unfamiliar places.  Or, we slip and feel totally lost and like we'll never get back on track.
Trusting that the path we're on is not easy, but even if we have that momentary sense of being lost, trusting that recovery is the right step is why we keep fighting!!!
So next time you feel 'lost', stop and take a deep breath.  Before long, familiar things will return and you'll be back on track fighting Ed in no time!!

February 26th - March 3rd is an important week!! No, it's not my Birthday, my wedding anniversary, or any other family event ….

….. IT'S NATIONAL EATING DISORDER AWARENESS WEEK!!!!

In honor of this week, The Cariad Foundation is proud to be hosting many events throughout the week and we hope you can join us as we spread the word that recovery IS possible!!!!


Here's the plan!!

Sunday 26th February - Yoga in the park; details tbc

Monday 27th February - use this day to tell people about eating disorders and that recovery IS possible!!

Tuesday 28th February - Join us for a 'scale bashing' event at our support meeting, along with other activities to show that the scale is nothing more than a metal object!! For more info on how to find us, go to www.edrecoveryjax.com for info!

Wednesday 29th February - We will be hosting a screening of "Someday Melissa". After the movie, there will be a Q & A session, with a panel made up of local professionals, an eating disorder survivor, and a loved one of someone who struggled.

Thursday 1st March - join us at our online meeting, from 8:30 pm - 9:30 pm, where Jenni Schaefer will be joining us!

Friday 2nd March - The Cariad Foundation spreads the word to 9th Graders about eating disorders and more!

Saturday 3rd March - The inaugural Fighting Back 5k Walk, Run, and 1 mile fun run for kids! Jenni Schaefer will be in attendance, speaking, participating, and signing books!

So, be sure to join us at one or more of these events. And for more information, please email us at cariadfoundation@gmail.com and watch for information about town!

As NEDA says, "Everybody knows somebody" so let's keep fighting and help them see that recovery IS possible!!

- Ally, Blair, Deb, Heather, and Linda

So today we got the exciting confirmation that Jenni Schaefer is going to join us at the inaugural Fighting Back 5k!!!!! yes, she is headed to the beautiful beaches of Jacksonville to help The Cariad Foundation in raising awareness about eating disorders, as well as some money to be awarded as grants.
yes, if you've not signed up for yet, GO DO IT NOW!!!!! Go on, I DARE you!!!!
The link for signing up is: http://www.jax365.com/fighting-back-5k
Hope you can join us for what promises to be an AMAZING day and yet another message to Ed that he's not welcome!!!!!

This weekend I had a blast down in Daytona at the 24 hours of Daytona, Rolex car racing! From not worrying about food, to enjoying time with friends, camping in my car, and much, much more … it was truly a fun and freeing weekend!!
Of course, I couldn't help but think of recovery - well, and Ed's obnoxious voice really!! You see, being so close to the race track and hearing those cars zoom by, it was hard to have a conversation. Actually, it was pretty impossible and even though we put ear buds in to deafen out the cars, you could still hear them! Ed's voice is as loud as those cars are and to be honest, it was often impossible to drown out his obnoxious drivel. Listening for the recovery voice was virtually impossible because you couldn't hear it's quiet whisper above that yelling.
So how can you fight back? Well, for us we had to find new and creative ways of hearing each other! We texted or used the notepad feature on our phones, we went and sat in our car where it was a little quieter, or we found a quieter place where we could really talk. And so in fighting Ed, you have to find those same ways to listen to recovery …. perhaps ensuring you make a phone call, planning dinner with a friend if hitting that meal plan is tough, or simply going for a walk to get out in the fresh air.
What are you going to do this week to fight back against Ed's din? Go on, I DARE you to try something new!!
Zoom, zoom!!!!!

so today I was sitting talking with someone and reflecting on how something had gone. Giving feedback is never an easy thing, especially when it's giving honesty about areas where they need to keep working.
As humans, I think it's natural that when we hear that 'negative' feedback, we struggle to see past that and realize it's actually constructive feedback that can allow us to continue growing and learning. As a defense mechanism, we often move into presenting reasons why it happened the way it did, why it went wrong, etc.
Ed is the master of excuses. If a meal is missed, Ed tells us that ti's ok because 'you were stressed and it would make sense your appetite was gone', or if you purged, he'll tell you a lie like 'it's ok, you were probably allergic anyway and so no big deal'. But the reality is, there is no excuse for listening to Ed if we are really serious about recovery. There comes a point where we have to fight back and 'just do it'!! That's not to say that recovery is going to be perfect and that we'll never have any slips, we will!!, but that's when we have to accept they happened, and then move on without it becoming an excuse for continuing to listen to Ed.
One of my phrases I say is "No ifs, no buts, NO OPTION'!!!!! You see, I realized that the only way I was going to fight Ed as to have the mentality that i was no longer going to listen to his crap because when it came to following my meal plan, finding a healthy balance for exercise, making phone calls, etc, those were things I had to do no matter what!!
And so this weekend, I challenge you to fight Ed with the 'no ifs, no buts, NO OPTION' mentality!! When Ed suggests a behavior, stick your fingers in your ears and scream out 'la la la la la'!!! When you don't want to make that phone call that you know will provide support, do it anyway - you now you'll be glad you did!!!!
Go on, I DARE you!! For an hour, a morning, an afternoon, or even a day, tell Ed that there are NO excuses because you WANT recovery and are willing to do whatever it takes!! YOU CAN DO IT!!!!!!

so today I was sitting talking with someone and reflecting on how something had gone. Giving feedback is never an easy thing, especially when it's giving honesty about areas where they need to keep working.
As humans, I think it's natural that when we hear that 'negative' feedback, we struggle to see past that and realize it's actually constructive feedback that can allow us to continue growing and learning. As a defense mechanism, we often move into presenting reasons why it happened the way it did, why it went wrong, etc.
Ed is the master of excuses. If a meal is missed, Ed tells us that ti's ok because 'you were stressed and it would make sense your appetite was gone', or if you purged, he'll tell you a lie like 'it's ok, you were probably allergic anyway and so no big deal'. But the reality is, there is no excuse for listening to Ed if we are really serious about recovery. There comes a point where we have to fight back and 'just do it'!! That's not to say that recovery is going to be perfect and that we'll never have any slips, we will!!, but that's when we have to accept they happened, and then move on without it becoming an excuse for continuing to listen to Ed.
One of my phrases I say is "No ifs, no buts, NO OPTION'!!!!! You see, I realized that the only way I was going to fight Ed as to have the mentality that i was no longer going to listen to his crap because when it came to following my meal plan, finding a healthy balance for exercise, making phone calls, etc, those were things I had to do no matter what!!
And so this weekend, I challenge you to fight Ed with the 'no ifs, no buts, NO OPTION' mentality!! When Ed suggests a behavior, stick your fingers in your ears and scream out 'la la la la la'!!! When you don't want to make that phone call that you know will provide support, do it anyway - you now you'll be glad you did!!!!
Go on, I DARE you!! For an hour, a morning, an afternoon, or even a day, tell Ed that there are NO excuses because you WANT recovery and are willing to do whatever it takes!! YOU CAN DO IT!!!!!!

As a teacher, I am constantly in situations where I'm helping students grow and learn. This semester, I also have an intern and it's been awesome in that it's really helping me reflect and learn too!
Learning to be a teacher is tough!! There are so many intricate details that we don't realize take place until we are actually managing the class. Consequently, when it feels like it's falling apart, the instinctive feeling is "I'm a failure", "I made a mistake", or "I did that all wrong". Thinking that way leaves us feeling dejected and certainly that was obvious in my room today. Any positives were completely overlooked because the focus was drawn totally to the 'mistakes'.
Recovery can so often feel that way. We forget to notice the things we are doing well, we ignore the fact that we managed to make a phone call, follow a meal plan, or get out of bed because of one slip that may have happened. And yet, without those small steps, we would not be moving - and whether we realize it or not, we are always making progress!
And so the challenge is to truly focus on the successes and stop Ed from stealing those moments from us. Perhaps the time has come for you to keep a success journal - writing down at least 1 success each day. Imagine what an incredible tool this would be for you on the days where Ed's negative voice is truly obnoxious!! Go on, I DARE you to go buy a journal today and start writing in it. I think you'll be surprised by the positive impact it can have!!!!